Positive Reinforcement for Kids: What It Is and Where to Start

New here? Start here.

  1. Try it tonight, free: the Token Board Starter Kit (printable token board, reward cards and a one-page how-to).
  2. Want a full plan? The 7-Day Token Economy System for Parents walks you through one week, day by day, with 12 printables ($9).
  3. Child with ADHD? Read Positive Reinforcement for ADHD.
  4. Curious how token systems work? See Token Economy.

I'm C. Patrick Cliver. Both of my sons were diagnosed with ADHD and, later, Asperger's. Before that I spent five years in the employee-incentives business, running what were basically token economies for adults. This site is what I learned at home, written in plain English.

What is positive reinforcement?

Positive reinforcement means adding something your child likes right after a behavior you want to see more of, so that behavior becomes more likely next time. The "something" is called a reinforcer. It can be praise, a hug, a sticker, a token toward a bigger reward, or a fun activity.

Think of a token chart as a scoreboard your child can see. It turns "be good" into something concrete they can win.

Parents like it because it works with the child instead of against them. It doesn't rely on yelling, shaming or punishment, which the American Academy of Pediatrics notes "can be humiliating or discourage your child from even trying" (AAP, 2023).

It's one tool in the toolbox, not a cure-all. It may not fit every child or every situation, and that's okay.

Where it comes from

Positive reinforcement grew out of early 20th-century psychology (foundational work, now over 80 years old):

  • Ivan Pavlov showed that dogs learned to link a bell with food. That's classical conditioning, a close cousin of what this site is about.
  • Edward Thorndike found that actions followed by a pleasing result tend to be repeated (his "law of effect").
  • B. F. Skinner coined the term operant conditioning and did the most to bring reinforcement into everyday use, from classrooms to clinics.

The key ideas, in plain English

Reinforcement vs. punishment. Reinforcement makes a behavior more likely; punishment makes it less likely. "Positive" here means adding something, not "nice." This site focuses on adding good things for good behavior.

Reinforcers. Anything your child finds motivating: attention, praise, privileges, activities, small items. What works for one child may not work for another, so let your child help choose (AAP, 2023).

Extinction. When a behavior stops paying off, it tends to fade. If a tantrum no longer gets a child what they want, tantrums usually decrease over time.

Satiation. The same reward over and over loses its punch. Ice cream is exciting until you've had it for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Rotate rewards to keep them fresh.

Timing and schedules. When you reinforce matters as much as what you use. Reinforce right away and every time while a new behavior is being learned; once it's a habit, you can space rewards out and lean on praise.

Shaping and chaining. Big skills are taught in small steps. You reward "close enough" at first (shaping) or reward each step of a routine in order (chaining), then raise the bar a little at a time.

Token systems. Tracking gets hard without a system. A token economy uses stars, chips or points that your child saves up and trades for a reward they picked. Tokens tend to suit younger school-age kids; points and written agreements often work better for older children (AAP, 2023).

Where you can use it

At home, in the car, at the grocery store, at a restaurant. Teachers, coaches and youth leaders use it with whole groups. Adults run on it too: think loyalty points and airline miles.

The real strength is that you can measure it. Pick one behavior, write down how often it happens, and see whether it changes. You don't need to be a clinician to keep a simple tally.

Keep going

Free printable: get the Token Board Starter Kit and start tonight.

Source: American Academy of Pediatrics, HealthyChildren.org, "Positive Reinforcement Through Rewards," updated 2023. History section: foundational work by Pavlov, Thorndike and Skinner (early to mid 20th century).

Positive Reinforcement for Kids shares educational information from a parent's perspective. It is not medical, psychological, or professional advice. Talk with your child's doctor or a licensed professional about your child's specific needs.

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